Yes, I know that comparing yourself to others is the definition of hell. But it is also the point of "class reunion", yes?
It really shouldn't be a shock. I was right there while it happened. And I'm going to generously estimate that 50% of those events where choices I actually made (as opposed to letting things abide), but it still ended up in the exact opposite of my desired result. I have always lived within 5 miles of the house I grew up in. I work across the street from the hospital where I was born. I went to the state university in town, twice.
Yet, I don't feel duped or unhappy. I love knowing all the houses in the neighborhood, and having the back story on so many stories. I feel like I belong here.
And it's not like everyone got away, either. There are quite a few that stayed in Hometown. One man, who described his desperation to get away after high school, basically moved to the mid-state equivalent of our Hometown and created a life he could have just as easily lived in our Hometown. I understand. I know how this could happen.
I just always pictured myself in a major city. But then I took none of the steps to get me there and now I would give up none of my prizes to do it in the present. It's time to let the dream die. Isn't it?
I want to agree with you...but, I also don't want to live in Battle Creek. I did not grow up here, but definitely consider this my "hometown" - Having done some traveling, I think I have realized, what is most important is the people and environments with which you chose to surround yourself. It seems that most places used to feel like I "didn't belong there" because they were so far from what I knew, and now, most places have been made so generic, it almost takes the fun out of even visiting different locations. You know, for the first time in my whole life, I vacationed in my own home state, and it was the best (most relaxing) vacation I have ever had.
ReplyDeleteI envy friends that have been able to pack everything they own into a suitcase or three, and chart off to exotic locales like Chicago, San Francisco, Denmark or Thailand. I wish that I could abandon my "stuff" and bid adieu to family and friends. But I can't. One thing that I've noticed in my worldly travels is that I seem to enjoy the small towns, both here and abroad, every bit as much as I enjoy big cities. I've had great times in small European villages and small midwestern towns. It boils down to people. I've been to a formal class reunion - just once - no need to do that again. There are some great people that I went to high school with, but a lot of them turned out to be douchebags. I have a feeling that big cities have more douchebags, per capita, than an average college town like the one we live in.
ReplyDeleteI think it's great that we have big cities to visit... but I'd rather live in a place with good people. People that I could marry. Wouldn't it be great if you could just marry your friends? Now THAT'S something worth pondering further...