Tuesday, August 7, 2012

You've made a decision by not making a decision.

What I really discovered at the brief discussions with classmates last weekend (I avoided the cocktail-dressed standing around event, for the shorts-n-beer standing around event), is that although it seems everyone just wanted to get as far away from Hometown as much as I did, I did not make it. I don't know why this shocks me, but it does.

Yes, I know that comparing yourself to others is the definition of hell. But it is also the point of "class reunion", yes?

It really shouldn't be a shock. I was right there while it happened. And I'm going to generously estimate that 50% of those events where choices I actually made (as opposed to letting things abide), but it still ended up in the exact opposite of my desired result. I have always lived within 5 miles of the house I grew up in. I work across the street from the hospital where I was born. I went to the state university in town, twice.

Yet, I don't feel duped or unhappy. I love knowing all the houses in the neighborhood, and having the back story on so many stories. I feel like I belong here.

And it's not like everyone got away, either. There are quite a few that stayed in Hometown. One man, who described his desperation to get away after high school, basically moved to the mid-state equivalent of our Hometown and created a life he could have just as easily lived in our Hometown. I understand. I know how this could happen.

I just always pictured myself in a major city. But then I took none of the steps to get me there and now I would give up none of my prizes to do it in the present. It's time to let the dream die. Isn't it?

2 comments:

  1. I want to agree with you...but, I also don't want to live in Battle Creek. I did not grow up here, but definitely consider this my "hometown" - Having done some traveling, I think I have realized, what is most important is the people and environments with which you chose to surround yourself. It seems that most places used to feel like I "didn't belong there" because they were so far from what I knew, and now, most places have been made so generic, it almost takes the fun out of even visiting different locations. You know, for the first time in my whole life, I vacationed in my own home state, and it was the best (most relaxing) vacation I have ever had.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I envy friends that have been able to pack everything they own into a suitcase or three, and chart off to exotic locales like Chicago, San Francisco, Denmark or Thailand. I wish that I could abandon my "stuff" and bid adieu to family and friends. But I can't. One thing that I've noticed in my worldly travels is that I seem to enjoy the small towns, both here and abroad, every bit as much as I enjoy big cities. I've had great times in small European villages and small midwestern towns. It boils down to people. I've been to a formal class reunion - just once - no need to do that again. There are some great people that I went to high school with, but a lot of them turned out to be douchebags. I have a feeling that big cities have more douchebags, per capita, than an average college town like the one we live in.

    I think it's great that we have big cities to visit... but I'd rather live in a place with good people. People that I could marry. Wouldn't it be great if you could just marry your friends? Now THAT'S something worth pondering further...

    ReplyDelete